Yes, last night's post might have looked like my "goodbye" to this world. But it wasn't! I was just my expressing my desire to be free from this flesh and present with my Lord.
And it is when I'm sick that I feel the most desirous of my eternal home.
Here is the deal that has me down:
Its having to give up on things that I so want to participate in. I've mentioned before how difficult it is to be undependable where I can't even count on myself!
A few months ago I lost a $50.00 deposit for a weekend retreat that I was looking really forward to attending, because illness made it impossible for me to attend.
And now I'm looking at this S'mores & More family weekend. I really want to go. We've invited the Grandkids. I can't imagine not being able to participate.
Right now I am just praying my heart out that I will be well enough later in the day to pack and get ready.
In less than two weeks I've been entirely blessed with plane tickets to spend a week with some precious online friends in Texas. How I hope and pray that I can count on that.
So I get a choice.. ultimately should I just give up on making plans and sit here without any excited expectations around the corner? Or should I continue making plans with the knowledge that there is a possibility that it won't work out? I figure I should keep on hoping for the best and count on being able to do these things.
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Hi,
ReplyDeleteI cannot imagine what you must endure. I pray that the Lord heals you. I am not sure what I would do in your situation... However, one thing comes to mind: focus on and celebrate what you can do, focus less on what you cannot do.
God is with you.
I am so glad you were able to get out and enjoy the kids! We love you!!
ReplyDelete~ Jeannie
I did not know you had these "invisable illnesses"
ReplyDeleteI too have 2. Mine are fibromyalgia and RA...I, like you have wanted out of this flesh on many occasions. I too have missed lots of fun things because of my diseases. I also know that God has some kind of reason for this season in my life and yours too. I pray God's richest blessings to you.
Plan to participate (Plan A) then have a plan on what to do if Plan A doesn't work out (Plan B). This is a skill passed on to me from a counselor when I was getting radiation therapy for cancer. Plan B helps with the disappointment and depression for the times Plan A doesn't work. I save up certain "quiet time" activities I love to do for Plan B time. It works! Praying for you and your family, hoping my hint can help in some small way. Your grandchildren have a grandmother that loves them 200%, and that counts for more than any activity.
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